14-Week Study & Discussion Guide

A Praying Life

by Paul Miller·87 discussion questions

Last updated August 16, 2026

Week 1 — FreeRead the Introduction and Part One overview of A Praying Life (through the opening framing chapters)

Discussion question your group will work through:

1.Miller says that most Christians are embarrassed about their prayer lives. Were you relieved or unsettled to read that admission from an author writing a book on prayer? What does your reaction tell you about your own assumptions?

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About This Study Guide

At a glance: this is a 14-week study and discussion guide for A Praying Life by Paul Miller, with 87 questions organized by reading assignment. Week 1 is free to read, with no card required.

A Praying Life by Paul E. Miller begins with a disarmingly honest confession: prayer is hard, and most of us don't do it very well. Rather than offering another set of techniques or disciplines to master, Miller diagnoses the deeper problem — we have stopped being needy. We have learned to live as "functional atheists," managing our lives with skill and self-sufficiency while leaving God largely out of the picture. The book's central argument is that the solution is not more willpower but a recovery of childlike dependence — learning to bring our real selves, with all our mess and confusion and longing, into honest conversation with a Father who loves us.

This study guide is designed for eight to thirteen weeks of individual or small-group engagement with A Praying Life. The pattern each week is simple: read the assigned chapter (or section) before you meet, spend some time journaling your honest responses to one or two questions, then discuss as a group. Some weeks you will feel convicted; others you will feel encouraged. Both are signs that the material is working. The questions move from comprehension (what is Miller actually saying?) to personal application (where do I see this in my own life?) to theological reflection (how does this connect to the gospel?). Don't rush past the personal questions — the book's power is in its honesty, and the discussion will only go as deep as participants are willing to go.

By the end of this guide you should have a clearer picture of why you don't pray, a more childlike posture toward God, and practical handles for weaving prayer into the fabric of ordinary life. Miller's goal — and ours — is not that you would feel guilty about prayer but that you would begin to want it, the way a child wants to talk to a parent who is genuinely good. Expect slow, uneven growth. That is exactly the kind of growth this book is about.

Introduction — Learning to Pray Like a Child

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Read the Introduction and Part One overview of A Praying Life (through the opening framing chapters)

Miller opens by admitting that his prayer life was a mess — and invites us to confess the same. Before diving into solutions, this week is simply about honesty.

2.He argues that prayerlessness is rooted not primarily in busyness or laziness but in unbelief — a functional sense that prayer doesn't really work or matter. Do you agree with that diagnosis? Where do you see it in your own life?

3.Miller uses the image of a child freely and constantly talking to a parent as the model for prayer. What would have to change in your view of God for you to relate to him that way?

a.What has shaped your image of God — and is that image one that invites you to come freely?

b.Where did you learn (formally or informally) how to pray, and what did those lessons communicate about what God expects?

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14-Week Schedule

Chapter 1 — Intro to Childlike Prayer / Learning to Be Helpless

All 7 questions →

Read Chapters 1–2 of A Praying Life ("Learning to Pray Like a Child" and "Learning to Be Helpless")

1.Miller describes watching his daughter Kim (who has severe autism) and learning from her unself-conscious neediness. What did that image open up for you about what God might want from us in prayer?

+ 6 more questions in the full guide

Chapter 3 — Why We Don't Pray

All 6 questions →

Read Chapter 3 of A Praying Life ("Why We Don't Pray")

1.Miller identifies several reasons people don't pray: it feels one-sided, we get distracted, we are too busy, and we don't believe it works. Which of these resonates most with your experience — and which one have you been least honest about?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapter 4 — Become Like a Little Child

All 6 questions →

Read Chapter 4 of A Praying Life ("Become Like a Little Child")

1.Miller identifies several qualities of children that make them natural pray-ers: they ask without shame, they live in the present, they don't hide their emotions, and they persist without embarrassment. Which of these qualities do you most lack in your own prayer?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 5–6 — The Life of Prayer and Contemplative Prayer

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 5–6 of A Praying Life ("Learning to Pray in the Spirit" and "Bending Your Heart to God")

1.Miller describes prayer as "talking to God about what we are doing together" rather than a separate religious activity we perform. How does this reframing change the way you think about when and how to pray?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 7–8 — Prayer Cards and Praying Without Ceasing

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 7–8 of A Praying Life ("Using Prayer Cards" and "Keeping Track: How to Use a Prayer Journal")

1.Miller's prayer card system is deliberately simple — physical cards with specific people and situations written on them. What is your immediate reaction to this idea? Freeing, tedious, helpful, or something else?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 9–11 — A Story That Is Too Small / Suffering and Prayer

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 9–11 of A Praying Life ("Living in the Story" through "Spending Time with God")

1.Miller argues that most of us are living inside a "smaller story" — one focused on our own comfort, reputation, or success — and that this small story makes prayer feel unnecessary or disappointing. What is the dominant story you are living inside right now?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 12–14 — The Problem of Unanswered Prayer

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 12–14 of A Praying Life (covering the terrain of persistence, unanswered prayer, and what God is doing when he seems silent)

1.Miller says that unanswered prayer is not an anomaly — it is part of the normal Christian experience, embedded in how God works. How does that statement land for you? Does it relieve you, frustrate you, or both?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 15–17 — Prayer and Faith / Praying in Light of God's Will

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 15–17 of A Praying Life (covering faith, God's will, and the tension between asking boldly and submitting humbly)

1.Miller pushes back against the "name it and claim it" approach to prayer while also pushing back against a fatalistic "whatever will be, will be" approach. Where do you tend to land on that spectrum — and why?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 18–20 — Praying in the Spirit / Overcoming Evil

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 18–20 of A Praying Life (covering spiritual warfare, intercession, and the communal dimensions of prayer)

1.Miller argues that prayer is not just personal and private but has a cosmic dimension — we are engaging spiritual realities that are larger than our individual situations. How does this expand or change your understanding of what prayer is for?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 21–23 — The Listening Side of Prayer

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 21–23 of A Praying Life (covering God's voice, the role of Scripture in prayer, and learning to listen)

1.Miller argues that one of the reasons prayer feels one-sided is that we have not learned to listen — we treat prayer as a monologue aimed at God rather than a dialogue with him. Does prayer feel like a conversation to you? What would help make it more two-directional?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 24–26 — A Praying Life in Community

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 24–26 of A Praying Life (covering corporate prayer, praying with others, and what it means to build a praying community)

1.Many people find corporate prayer — praying out loud with others — more uncomfortable than private prayer. Why do you think that is? What fears or self-consciousness arise when you are asked to pray in a group?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Chapters 27–Conclusion — Looking Back, Looking Forward

All 6 questions →

Read Chapters 27 through the conclusion of A Praying Life

1.Miller ends the book not with a triumphant account of a perfect prayer life but with an honest picture of ongoing struggle and ongoing grace. Does that ending encourage or disappoint you — and what does your reaction reveal about your expectations?

+ 5 more questions in the full guide

Review & Reflection — Looking Back Across the Whole Book

All 8 questions →

No new reading this week. Review your notes, journal entries, and prayer cards from the entire study

1.Which chapter or section of A Praying Life was most significant for you — the one where something genuinely shifted? What was it about that material that broke through?

+ 7 more questions in the full guide

Book Club Questions More by Paul Miller Prayer & Spiritual Warfare Spiritual Growth & Disciplines For Small Groups For Individual Study For Churches Free Question Generator Make a Reading Schedule

Related Study Guides

If your group enjoys A Praying Life, these studies pair well with it.

Too Busy Not to Pray

by Bill Hybels

Prayer: Experiencing Awe and Intimacy with God

by Timothy Keller

The Battle Plan for Prayer

by Stephen Kendrick & Alex Kendrick

About the A Praying Life guide

How many weeks is the A Praying Life study guide?

This study guide covers A Praying Life in 14 weeks, with week-by-week discussion questions, reading references, and closing prayers for each session.

How many discussion questions are included?

The complete guide includes 87 discussion questions across 14 weeks — an average of 6 questions per week, designed for group conversation.

Can I use this guide for a book club?

Yes — the questions are written for group discussion and work well for small groups, book clubs, church studies, and couples reading together.

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