Book Club Questions for Practicing the Way

1.Comer opens by describing a growing hunger he observed — people who were spiritually restless, attending church, even believing the right things, but not actually being transformed. Does that description resonate with your own experience? What drew you to pick up this book?

2.The book is organized around three goals: to be *with* Jesus, to *become like* Jesus, and to *do what Jesus did*. In your own words, what is the difference between those three things? Which of the three feels most distant from your life right now?

3.Comer suggests that many of us have reduced Christianity to a set of beliefs to hold rather than a life to live. Where do you think that reduction came from — culturally, historically, or personally?

1.Comer makes the claim that "we are all being spiritually formed — all the time, by everything around us." What are two or three of the most formative forces in your own life right now? Be honest — not just the ones you wish were most formative.

2.Comer draws on the idea that our habits and practices shape our *desires*, not just our behavior — that what we repeatedly do is what we gradually become. How does that insight challenge the way you have typically thought about personal change or spiritual growth?

3.He argues that the modern world is not neutral — it is aggressively forming us toward particular values: speed, distraction, consumerism, and self-sufficiency. Can you identify a specific habit or appetite in your own life that you suspect the modern world has formed in you without your conscious consent?

1.Comer argues that "disciple" was not a religious word in Jesus' day — it was a vocational one. An apprentice organized their entire life around learning from and becoming like a master. How does that historical context redefine what you thought discipleship meant?

2.He describes three goals of apprenticeship: to *be with* the master, to *become like* the master, and to *do what* the master does. Comer suggests that most of our church programs focus almost entirely on the third goal while neglecting the first two. Do you agree? What evidence do you see for or against that in your own experience?

3.Comer is honest that becoming an apprentice of Jesus costs something — it is not merely adding a few spiritual habits to your existing life. What would you have to *subtract* from your current life to genuinely make space for apprenticeship to Jesus?

1.Comer argues that the most fundamental need of the human soul is not information, not forgiveness (as crucial as that is), but *presence* — the felt nearness of God. Does that framing surprise you? What does it suggest about what we should be looking for in prayer, worship, or Scripture reading?

2.He draws on the relationship between Jesus and his first disciples — they literally *walked with him*, ate with him, and watched him. Comer asks: what is the contemporary equivalent of that kind of proximity? How do we cultivate nearness to someone we cannot physically see?

3.Comer talks about the danger of relating to Jesus primarily through *tasks* — reading, praying, serving — rather than through *relationship*. Have you ever experienced spiritual disciplines becoming more about checking boxes than about actually being with God? What did that feel like, and what did it produce in you?

1.Comer argues that the goal of the Christian life is *Christlikeness* — becoming like Jesus in the deepest parts of our character and personality. How does that goal differ from being a "good person" or a "moral person"? Why does the distinction matter?

2.He explores the idea that Jesus was not just morally good but emotionally healthy — that he felt the full range of human emotion without being controlled by any of them. What does that portrait of Jesus challenge in your own emotional life?

3.Comer is careful to say that becoming like Jesus is not the same as becoming Jesus — we are not erasing our individuality but healing and restoring it. How does the idea that your unique personality can be sanctified rather than suppressed change how you think about spiritual maturity?

1.Comer argues that "doing what Jesus did" is meant to flow from "being with" and "becoming like" Jesus — that mission is meant to be the overflow of formation, not the substitute for it. Why do you think so many churches get this backward, starting with doing rather than being?

2.He explores what Jesus actually *did* — not just his miracles and teaching but his practices: early morning prayer, retreating to solitary places, sharing meals, serving the marginalized. Which of those practices do you find most compelling? Which most foreign to your life?

3.Comer is honest about the danger of a Christianity focused almost entirely on activism and service — that it can produce burned-out, bitter, or performative people. Have you seen that pattern in yourself or others? What does it suggest about the source of sustainable love and service?

1.The phrase "Rule of Life" can sound off-putting — even legalistic — to Protestant ears. How does Comer reframe what a Rule of Life actually is? What is the difference between a rule *about* life and a rhythm *for* life?

2.Comer traces the Rule of Life back through church history — through Benedict of Nursia and the monastic tradition — and argues that Christians have always needed structured rhythms to sustain spiritual life. Does it surprise you that this practice has such deep historical roots? How does that history affect how you receive it?

3.He argues that we all already *have* a rule of life — our current habits and rhythms are already forming us in some direction. The question is whether that rule is intentional or accidental. What does your *current*, unexamined rule of life look like? What is it forming you toward?

1.Comer notes that Jesus — who had a world-saving mission — consistently withdrew to solitary places to pray. What does it say about the pace Jesus thought was sustainable? What does it say about the source of his power?

2.He argues that most of us are terrified of silence — that we fill every gap in our day with noise, screens, and stimulation specifically to avoid being alone with ourselves. Honestly: how comfortable are you with silence and solitude? What do you find yourself reaching for when things get quiet?

3.Comer draws on Blaise Pascal's observation that "all of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone." What do you think Pascal meant by that, and do you think it's true? What does our flight from solitude reveal about us?

1.Comer begins by acknowledging what most Christians feel but are reluctant to admit: prayer is hard, often boring, and frequently feels one-sided. How does naming that difficulty honestly change the conversation about prayer? Have you felt permission before to admit that prayer is hard?

2.He argues that Jesus' disciples had watched people pray their whole lives, but something about *how Jesus prayed* made them ask, "Lord, teach us to pray" (Luke 11:1). What do you think they were observing in Jesus that made his prayer life so striking? What might it suggest about what prayer is meant to look and feel like?

3.Comer explores different dimensions of prayer — adoration, confession, thanksgiving, supplication — not as a formula but as a range of relational postures. Which of those dimensions comes most naturally to you? Which feels most underdeveloped?

1.Comer describes Sabbath not as a restriction but as a gift — a weekly protest against the lie that our worth is in our productivity. How does that reframe change how you feel about the idea of a regular day of rest?

2.He traces Sabbath back to Genesis 2, where God himself *rested* on the seventh day — not out of exhaustion but as a declaration that the work was complete. What does it mean that the Creator built rest into the very structure of creation? What does that say about rest being *holy* rather than lazy?

3.Comer is blunt: most Western Christians have essentially abandoned Sabbath. Why do you think that happened? What cultural pressures make a full day of rest feel impossible or irresponsible?

1.Comer argues that spiritual formation in isolation is both dangerous and incomplete — that we need community to see our blind spots, bear our burdens, and sustain us through the long haul. Do you agree? Have you experienced the limitations of trying to grow spiritually on your own?

2.He paints a picture of the early church in Acts 2 — a community that devoted themselves to teaching, fellowship, breaking bread, and prayer, and that turned their world upside down. How does that portrait compare to your experience of church? What is the most significant gap you notice?

3.Comer talks about the difference between *attending church* and being in a *community of practice* — a smaller circle of people who are intentionally pursuing formation together. Do you have that kind of community? If not, what has prevented it from forming?

1.Looking back across the entire book, which chapter or concept landed most deeply with you? What was it about that particular idea that resonated — or unsettled — you most?

2.Comer's central argument is that we are all being formed, all the time, and the question is whether that formation is intentional or accidental. How has your understanding of what is forming you changed from the beginning of this study to now? What do you see differently?

3.The three goals — *with Jesus, becoming like Jesus, doing as Jesus did* — are meant to build on one another. Which of the three has been most challenging for you personally throughout this study? What do you think is at the root of that challenge?