Week 1: Introduction — A Define the Relationship (DTR) Moment

1.Idleman opens by describing what he calls a "DTR" — a Define the Relationship conversation. Have you ever had a DTR moment with Jesus, a point where you clearly defined what kind of relationship you actually have with him? Describe it, or describe why it has never happened.

2.The author distinguishes a "fan" as someone who is enthusiastic about Jesus but not committed to him — an admirer rather than a follower. In your own words, what is the sharpest difference between a fan and a follower as Idleman sets it up in the introduction?

3.Idleman suggests that many people sitting in churches every week are fans, not followers — and that they may not know it. How does that claim land with you? Does it feel like an exaggeration, or does it ring true from your own experience of church culture?

4.He points out that Jesus never seems to recruit followers by making the invitation easier — in fact he often makes it harder ("take up your cross daily"). Why do you think Jesus would do that? What does it tell us about what he is really after?

5.Idleman is honest that he has been a fan himself at certain points in his life, even as a pastor. What does his self-disclosure do for you as a reader? Does it make the book's challenge easier or harder to receive?

6.The introduction frames the whole book as a kind of mirror. What is the most uncomfortable thing you see when you hold up that mirror right now, at the very start of this study?

7.How does the fan/follower distinction connect to the gospel itself — to what Jesus actually accomplished on the cross and what he calls us into? Is following Jesus something you earn, or something you respond to?