The Prodigal So by Henri Nouwen

Week 4: Part Two — The Elder Son (I)

Read the first section of Part Two of The Return of the Prodigal Son (chapters on the elder son's resentment). Primary Scripture: Luke 15:25–30.

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Just when the parable seems to be heading toward a clean, joyful ending, the elder son appears — and Nouwen confesses, with disarming honesty, that this is where he most recognizes himself.

Discussion Questions

8 questions

1.The elder son is in the field when his brother returns — he has been working faithfully. He hears the music before he knows the reason for it. Nouwen notes that the elder son's complaint is not without justice: he has been obedient, and the returning rebel is celebrated. Why is the elder son's grievance so understandable — and yet, in Nouwen's reading, so spiritually dangerous?

2.Nouwen makes the provocative claim that the elder son's obedience has been, in its own way, a form of lostness — that staying home in body while remaining distant in heart is just as much a "far country" as the younger son's literal journey. Do you agree? What does it mean to be physically present but spiritually absent in our relationship with God?

3.The elder son says, "I have been slaving for you all these years and never disobeyed your orders." Nouwen hears in the word "slaving" a devastating self-revelation: the elder son has experienced his sonship as servitude. He has lived in the father's house without living in the father's love. Have you ever experienced your relationship with God primarily as obligation rather than intimacy? What does that feel like, and what sustains it?

a.What circumstances or theology tend to produce a "slave" mentality in your own faith?

b.What would it mean to do the same actions — prayer, service, faithfulness — from a place of love rather than duty?

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