The Prodigal So by Henri Nouwen

Week 6: Part Three — The Father (I)

Read the first section of Part Three of The Return of the Prodigal Son (chapters on becoming the father). Primary Scripture: Luke 15:20–24; also Romans 8:14–17.

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Having explored what it means to be each of the sons, Nouwen arrives at the most unexpected and demanding part of his journey: the call not merely to return to the Father, but to become one.

Discussion Questions

8 questions

1.Nouwen's friend and fellow priest suggested to him that he was not primarily the younger son or the elder son — he was the father. Nouwen resisted this at first. Why did he resist it? What made the call to become the father feel presumptuous or even frightening?

2.Nouwen describes the father in the painting as a figure of complete self-giving — bent over, pouring out, asking nothing in return. He connects this posture to Jesus' description of God's own character and to Paul's language in Romans 8 about being "children of God" and therefore also heirs. What does it mean that our inheritance includes not just being loved by the Father but being shaped into people who love as the Father loves?

3.Nouwen argues that becoming the father is the ultimate vocation of every Christian — not as an achievement, but as a destination that grace draws us toward. He distinguishes this from spiritual elitism or maturity as status. How does he frame this call in a way that keeps it humble and grace-dependent rather than heroic?

a.What in your own spiritual formation feels like movement toward the father's posture?

b.What in you actively resists it?

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