Boundaries with Kids by Henry Cloud & John Townsend

Week 12: Chapter 11 — Dealing with Specific Behaviors

Read Chapter 11 of Boundaries with Kids. Key Scripture: Proverbs 29:15; Colossians 3:21.

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After laying extensive groundwork, Cloud and Townsend get remarkably practical here, walking through how boundary principles apply to specific, real-world behaviors that parents find most challenging. Come with your most stubborn parenting challenge in mind.

Discussion Questions

8 questions

1.Cloud and Townsend address a range of specific behaviors in this chapter — tantrums, defiance, lying, irresponsibility, disrespect, and more. Which behavior do you find most difficult to address in your child, and what has your typical response been?

2.The authors treat each behavior as a diagnostic — a signal of what is missing in the child's character formation. For the behavior you identified above, what character quality is underdeveloped, and what boundary principle addresses it most directly?

3.Cloud and Townsend discuss the tantrum as a child's attempt to use emotional intensity to change the parent's behavior. What is the parent's most effective response to a tantrum, and why does that response work while others don't? Has it worked in your experience?

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