Boundaries with Kids by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
Week 5: Chapter 4 — Crossing the Line: Crossing Your Child's Boundaries
Read Chapter 4 of Boundaries with Kids. Key Scripture: Psalm 139:13–16; 1 Corinthians 13:4–7.
Previewing Week 5 of Boundaries with Kids
Read 3 of 8 discussion questions below. Unlock the complete 15-week guide when you’re ready.
One of the most challenging ideas in the book is that parents don't just fail to set boundaries — they actively violate their children's boundaries. This chapter calls us to honest self-examination about the ways we cross lines we should respect.
Discussion Questions
8 questions1.Cloud and Townsend argue that children have God-given boundaries of their own — their feelings, bodies, thoughts, and values — and that parents can violate those boundaries just as surely as a child can violate a parent's. Did this idea surprise you? How does it change the way you think about parental authority?
2.The authors describe the controlling parent as one who takes ownership of the child's inner life — telling them what they feel, what they should want, what they must think. How does this kind of parenting prevent a child from developing the self-knowledge they need to function as an adult?
3.Cloud and Townsend distinguish between shaping a child's will and breaking it. What is the difference? What does a broken-will child look like as an adult, compared to a child whose will was shaped and directed?