Discussion question your group will work through:
1.Lysa opens with the image of someone "bumping into her happy" and everything coming undone. Can you think of a recent moment — big or small — when something similar happened to you? What were the circumstances?
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About This Study Guide
Most of us know the feeling: someone bumps into our happy and suddenly we're saying things we regret, slamming doors we wish we hadn't, or retreating into a stony silence that slowly poisons a relationship. In Unglued, Lysa TerKeurst names that experience with refreshing honesty and then offers something better than a self-help strategy — she offers a biblical path toward emotional integrity. Her central thesis is simple but liberating: God gave us emotions to experience life, not destroy it. The goal is not to become a person who never feels anger, hurt, or frustration, but to become a person who processes those feelings in ways that don't leave wreckage behind. Drawing on her own candid stories of coming unglued — with her kids, her husband, strangers in parking lots — Lysa walks readers through the patterns that keep us stuck and the grace that sets us free.
This study guide is designed for six to eight weeks of individual journaling or small-group discussion, with one week devoted to the book's introduction and one week per major section or chapter cluster, plus a final week of review. Each week, read the assigned chapter(s) before your group meets or before you sit down to journal. Then work through the discussion questions slowly — don't rush to get through all of them. Some questions are designed to surface what the chapter actually said; others invite you to look honestly at your own patterns; still others ask you to connect Lysa's teaching to the gospel and to God's character. Use the closing prayer as a way to transition from reflection to surrender. A journal and a Bible are your best companions.
By the end of this guide, you will have a clearer picture of which "reactor type" you tend to be, a vocabulary for talking about your emotional patterns with honesty and without shame, and practical, Scripture-grounded tools for responding rather than reacting in your most difficult relationships. More than a behavior-modification program, Unglued is an invitation to imperfect progress — to trust that God is not finished with you, that His mercies are new every morning, and that the woman you are becoming is worth the hard work of getting there.
9-Week Schedule
- Week 1Introduction — Made for More Than This8 questions
- Week 2Chapters 1–2 — The Struggle Is Real, and There Is a Better Way8 questions
- Week 3Chapters 3–4 — Identifying Your Reactor Type8 questions
- Week 4Chapters 5–6 — Dealing With the Motivation Behind the Reaction8 questions
- Week 5Chapters 7–8 — Imperfect Progress and the Power of a Procedure8 questions
- Week 6Chapters 9–10 — Being Honest but Kind: Conflict and Difficult Relationships8 questions
- Week 7Chapters 11–12 — No Regrets: Responding Without Acting Out of Control8 questions
- Week 8The Soul-Filled Woman — Scripture Memory, Prayer, and Ongoing Practice7 questions
- Week 9Review & Reflection — The Journey of Imperfect Progress8 questions
Week 1: Introduction — Made for More Than This
Free sampleRead the Introduction of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: Psalm 86:11; Romans 12:2.
1.Lysa opens with the image of someone "bumping into her happy" and everything coming undone. Can you think of a recent moment — big or small — when something similar happened to you? What were the circumstances?
2.She is careful to distinguish between being an "unglued" person and having unglued moments. Why does that distinction matter, and how does it change the way you feel about yourself as you begin this study?
3.Lysa frames this book around a core conviction: God gave us emotions to experience life, not destroy it. What does that idea challenge or confirm in your current understanding of emotions and faith?
4.She admits that as a Christian woman she felt she was "supposed" to have it together emotionally, yet she clearly didn't. Where does that pressure come from in your own life — family background, church culture, personal expectations?
a.How has that pressure helped or hurt your ability to deal honestly with difficult emotions?
b.Have you ever hidden an emotional struggle because you feared judgment from other Christians?
5.The book promises that you can respond to situations out of control without acting out of control. On a scale of 1–10, how believable does that promise feel right now? What makes it hard to believe?
6.What relationship or recurring situation are you most hoping this book will help you navigate? Take a moment to name it specifically, even if only in your journal.
7.Romans 12:2 speaks of being "transformed by the renewing of your mind." How does Lysa's vision for emotional growth connect to that kind of transformation? What does renewal have to do with the way we react?
8.Lysa calls this journey one of "imperfect progress." How does the gospel — the truth that God accepts us fully in Christ even as He works to change us — make that kind of messy progress possible rather than discouraging?
Week 2: Chapters 1–2 — The Struggle Is Real, and There Is a Better Way
Read Chapters 1–2 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: James 1:19–20; Proverbs 29:11.
1.Lysa shares a vivid personal story of coming unglued — whether with her children, in traffic, or with someone who pushed a familiar button. Which of her stories felt most "that's me" to you, and why?
Week 3: Chapters 3–4 — Identifying Your Reactor Type
Read Chapters 3–4 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: Proverbs 14:29; Ephesians 4:26–27.
1.Lysa identifies four types of reactors: those who explode and blame others, those who explode and shame themselves, those who stuff and build barriers, and those who stuff and collect retaliation rocks. Which of these descriptions made you catch your breath in recognition?
Week 4: Chapters 5–6 — Dealing With the Motivation Behind the Reaction
Read Chapters 5–6 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: Proverbs 4:23; Matthew 12:34.
1.Lysa makes the point that our reactions reveal what is already inside us — that conflict is less a cause of our emotional state and more a revealer of it. How does Matthew 12:34 ("out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks") confirm or challenge that idea?
Week 5: Chapters 7–8 — Imperfect Progress and the Power of a Procedure
Read Chapters 7–8 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: Lamentations 3:22–23; Philippians 4:8–9.
1.Lysa introduces the concept of "imperfect progress" — celebrating small victories and refusing to let setbacks become the whole story. Why is this framing so important, and how does it differ from the way you typically evaluate your own emotional growth?
Week 6: Chapters 9–10 — Being Honest but Kind: Conflict and Difficult Relationships
Read Chapters 9–10 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: Ephesians 4:15; Colossians 4:6.
1.Lysa draws a sharp distinction between being honest and being kind — many of us have learned to sacrifice one for the other. Do you tend to default toward brutal honesty or toward dishonest kindness? What does either pattern cost you and the relationship?
Week 7: Chapters 11–12 — No Regrets: Responding Without Acting Out of Control
Read Chapters 11–12 of Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Primary Scripture: 1 Peter 3:8–9; Romans 12:17–21.
1.Lysa's phrase "responding without regrets" captures the ultimate goal of this book. What would a regret-free response look like in your most challenging relationship? Try to be specific — what words would you use? What would you not say?
Week 8: The Soul-Filled Woman — Scripture Memory, Prayer, and Ongoing Practice
Read the Conclusion and any appendix notes in Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Review key Scriptures used throughout the book: Psalm 86:11; James 1:19–20; Ephesians 4:26; Lamentations 3:22–23; Philippians 4:8.
1.Lysa repeatedly points to Scripture as the primary tool for emotional transformation — not as a magic formula but as the voice of the God who made us. Which verse or passage from this book has stayed with you most? Why this one?
Week 9: Review & Reflection — The Journey of Imperfect Progress
No new reading this week. Review your journal notes, underlined passages, and any notes from your group discussions throughout the study.
1.Which chapter or concept from *Unglued* had the greatest impact on you? What was it about that particular idea that landed so deeply?
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