Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
Week 7: Chapter 6 — Establishing Values in Your Marriage
Read Chapter 6 of Boundaries in Marriage. Key passages: Joshua 24:15; Matthew 6:33.
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Healthy limits don't emerge from thin air — they flow from clearly held values, and this chapter challenges couples to identify and articulate the values that will form the 'architecture' of their marriage.
Discussion Questions
8 questions1.Cloud and Townsend argue that a marriage without shared values is like a house without a foundation — conflicts become irresolvable because the couple has no agreed-upon standard to appeal to. What values do you and your spouse hold in common? Have you ever explicitly articulated them together?
2.The authors identify love — specifically the self-giving love of 1 Corinthians 13 — as the foundational value from which all other marital values flow. How does prioritizing love (rather than comfort, or fairness, or winning arguments) actually change the way conflicts get resolved?
3.Cloud and Townsend discuss the value of honesty — telling the truth in love — as essential to a covenant marriage. Think of an area in your marriage where honesty has been consistently difficult or avoided. What fear is behind the avoidance? What would it cost — and what would it gain — to become more honest there?
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