Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
Week 11: Chapter 15 — His Needs, Her Needs in the Bedroom
Read Chapter 15 of Love and Respect. Primary Scripture: 1 Corinthians 7:3–5; Song of Solomon 1:2.
Few topics reveal the love and respect dynamic more vividly — or more vulnerably — than sexual intimacy. Eggerichs brings the full weight of the book's thesis to bear on this area, and asks couples to see the marriage bed as a place where love and respect are expressed, not just physical need met.
Discussion Questions
8 questions1.Eggerichs argues that for a husband, sexual intimacy is closely tied to feeling respected — while for a wife, it is closely tied to feeling loved. How does this alignment between sex and the book's thesis help explain some of the tension many couples experience in this area?
2.1 Corinthians 7:3–5 commands spouses not to withhold from each other — describing the marriage covenant as involving a mutual giving of authority over one's body. How does this passage reframe sexual intimacy from being primarily about personal desire to being about covenantal faithfulness?
3.The author notes that many wives tie physical intimacy to emotional intimacy — 'I will feel like being close physically when I feel close emotionally.' Many husbands experience the reverse — they feel emotionally closer after physical intimacy. How has this difference created frustration or disconnection in your relationship?
a.Is there a way to honor both needs without one spouse always sacrificing theirs?
b.What would it look like to build more emotional intimacy as a pathway to physical intimacy — or vice versa?
Closing Prayer
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