Relationship Goals by Michael Todd
Week 6: Chapter 5 — Boundaries Are Your Friend
Read Chapter 5 of Relationship Goals by Michael Todd.
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Boundaries aren't walls that keep love out — they're guardrails that keep love on the road, and Todd makes the case that the boundaries you set before marriage determine the health you experience inside it.
Discussion Questions
7 questions1.Todd reframes boundaries not as restrictions that limit your freedom but as protections that preserve what you value. How does that reframe change your gut reaction to the word 'boundaries'? Do you naturally see them as limiting or liberating?
2.He's honest that setting physical and emotional boundaries in a dating relationship is genuinely difficult — especially when feelings are strong. What makes it harder to hold boundaries when you're emotionally invested in someone?
3.Todd points out that many people set physical boundaries but neglect emotional boundaries — becoming deeply emotionally enmeshed with someone before commitment has been established. Have you seen (or experienced) emotional intimacy outpacing commitment? What does that look like and what does it cost?
a.What is an emotional boundary you think is wise to keep in early stages of dating (e.g., not sharing your deepest wounds, not treating someone as a therapist)?
b.How do you know when emotional intimacy is healthy versus when it's moving too fast for the level of commitment in the relationship?
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