Week 4: Chapter 3 — The Essence of Marriage

1.Keller argues that the essence of marriage is a public, legal, and binding covenant — not a private emotional experience or a religious ceremony alone. How does defining marriage this way challenge both the 'piece of paper doesn't matter' view and the purely sentimental view of marriage?

2.Keller engages seriously with those who ask, 'Why do we need to get married? Can't two people simply be committed to each other without the formal institution?' What is his response, and do you find it convincing?

3.The chapter explores the vow as the constitutive act of marriage — the moment when two people are actually wed. Keller argues that the vow creates love, not just expresses it. How does this idea run counter to the way most people in our culture think about vows?