Boundaries by Henry Cloud
Week 9: Chapter 8 — Boundaries and Your Friends
Read Chapter 8 of Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
Previewing Week 9 of Boundaries
Read 3 of 7 discussion questions below. Unlock the complete 16-week guide when you’re ready.
Friendships are supposed to be chosen freely — yet many of us find ourselves just as stuck and resentful in friendships as in any other relationship. This chapter helps us understand why, and what to do about it.
Discussion Questions
7 questions1.Cloud and Townsend describe several kinds of draining friendships — the friend who is always in crisis, the friend who dominates every conversation, the friend who always needs but never gives. Have you experienced a friendship like one of these? What made it hard to address?
2.The authors argue that in many friendships, one person is the "giver" and one is the "taker" — and that this is not friendship in the biblical sense, but a parent-child dynamic. Why might someone find themselves repeatedly in the "giver" role? What need does it meet?
3.Cloud and Townsend distinguish between being a caring friend and being a friend's savior or therapist. What is the difference, and why does crossing that line ultimately hurt rather than help?